We Took a Break. Life Didn't. One year later, one engagement, and one very misunderstood compliment.

SPEAKER_01 0:04

Hello and welcome back to Kind of Preachy. I'm Steph Moore. I'm Casey Bryant. And we are doing a summer check-in. We are, because we've been out for a over a month. I think it's been like three weeks, maybe close to a month.

SPEAKER_00 0:17

And then But so much has happened in that three weeks that it feels like we've not seen each other in a long time.

SPEAKER_01 0:23

I do feel like it's been hard because I'm so used to debriefing everything with you here. Yes. We have the kind of friendship that we we text multiple times during the week. Correct. But we don't talk about like our stuff. We save it for here. We do. We really do. We talk about logistics.

SPEAKER_00 0:38

Yes. Like, what time are we going to meet? What day are we going to meet?

unknown 0:41

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:41

All that fun stuff. I'm going to fix your hair. It's like all up in your eyelash.

SPEAKER_00 0:45

I just washed my hair, so it's it's you got the wispies. It's feeling free. Yes, and it's in a bun. So it's really hard with the headphones. I'm like, is it front of the headphones? The bun? Bottom.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

It looks good. It looks good. Thanks for so before we get into all the things. I think we're gonna say we have realized that summer's really hard to do this podcast. Yes. It's hard for us to be in the same place. Now we could do the whole Zoom thing, but it feels like it's just that's not who we are. We're gonna, yeah. Or let's be honest, we just couldn't figure that out right now. I there there will be a season. There's actually, we have had so many people like kind of reach out and say like they want to be, but we, you know, on the podcast and we haven't really figured out the logistics of and we know other people do it.

SPEAKER_02 1:28

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:29

The dynamic of who we are is we like being in the same room. We do. Um because then you fix my hair. I think but I think when you're like listening, and I do, you listen back too. Yes. I what we the kind of the feedback we hear is like it's just sounds like you know, we're on a you know you're in a chat with us. Yes. Sounds like we're on a girl trip. Well, yeah, we're just you know, like you're hanging out with us. So while we're we're gonna call this a little check-in.

SPEAKER_00 1:55

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:56

And we may check in, you know, a few more times this summer. Maybe. Maybe because we also just realized. We just realized I'm out of town next week.

SPEAKER_00 2:04

She's out of town the next week. And then we got kids going back. I got kids going back to school to UK, yeah, Kentucky soon. Because all the back to school stuff is already out. Like it fourth of July happens. Easy. Back to school stuff. Out.

SPEAKER_01 2:19

It's nuts. I saw Halloween costumes at Costco today and I was like, not ready, not ready.

SPEAKER_00 2:23

No, not I'm not. I'm not there. Because I automatically go, Halloween, all that means we're going to be in the New Testament. So for those of you who are doing like Bible recap. Bible recap when we hit October 1st is when the New Testament starts.

SPEAKER_01 2:40

This is the first year my husband has been doing it. Yes. And he's just reading the plan. He's not doing like Bible recap. He's just doing the plan. And he's looks at me the other day and he was like, Can I just ask you a question? And I was like, What? He goes, Why do we call it hell? He goes, I have not read one word where that's in there. Why are we calling it that? And he's like using like, you know, like other words. He's like, Why isn't it called this? Because this is how to refer. I said what is it? You gotta wait. I'm like, you gotta wait for the New Testament. Oh yeah. And he was like, Are we almost there? I was like, no, no, you're not almost there. No, we got according to Costco, you are almost there. If you need a kind of encouragement of like, when do we get to the New Testament? If you follow retail, you're almost there.

SPEAKER_00 3:21

But in reality, we're not close.

SPEAKER_01 3:23

In reality, it's it's not so close.

SPEAKER_00 3:24

No, it's not so close.

SPEAKER_01 3:25

But anyway, so we're doing a little check-in. I don't know when the next check-in. I you're gonna see all of our things saying new episodes every Monday. That's a bold-faced lie, because I'm not gonna update those graphics.

SPEAKER_00 3:35

Why why should we?

SPEAKER_01 3:36

Because eventually it'll get soon. We will be back to to every Monday. Yeah, you'll hear us every Monday.

SPEAKER_00 3:43

I feel like probably, as I said, you will you we talked about before, like when school year starts, that's just when our routine happens and everything seems to be normalized for us.

SPEAKER_01 3:51

I think so.

SPEAKER_00 3:52

I think we're gonna get there. But a lot has happened in the last three weeks.

SPEAKER_01 3:58

Yes.

SPEAKER_00 3:59

Stuff that we have talked about, we've but we have not been able to discuss live or or to share because it's big news and you've been holding a secret for a long time.

SPEAKER_01 4:09

Oh, well, you know what? Here's what I have to say about this. You know, you all who listen to the podcast, this is not as big of a secret for you guys because you have uh we have been chatting. Well, you've been giving little There's been, you know, I don't want to say hints, but Easter eggs here and we talked about, you know, that my daughter, my oldest daughter, obviously, she's 22 and has met the love of her life and it happened very fast. Very fast. Because this is kind of like the thing of everybody's looking at like, how are you doing? And more so marriage counseling all the time. They had been doing marriage, like yes, they did premarital counseling kind of prior to engagement, and you know what? I was like, you're doing it all the right way. Yeah, it feels really fast to me, but that I'm not saying that you're not doing it the right way. They're great. I'm thrilled. But now it is no longer pre-engagement counseling because there is a ring on her finger.

SPEAKER_00 5:08

There is a ring on her finger. I saw the post.

SPEAKER_01 5:10

Yes, it is official. It's a gorgeous ring, he declared. And he did. It's perfect. It's so her. It's simple, it's uh elegant, it's timeless. It doesn't overbear her. Her mother who wears something massive. I just love that you flexed your ring. It's amazing. It's an amazing flex. It's you should be proud of your ring. Well, I mean, it's not a it's not, I mean, is lab real? Yes. Okay. But I mean, it's not like we it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. You love it? This is an exact replica of my original ring. What happened to your original ring? We had to have it resized when I gained weight. This is and when they resize something, like they I don't think they filled like the like like a piece of it with real gold. Because I've always had a marquee cut. And so I also had them add extra prongs. Yeah. It only had four prongs, and I had them add four, make it six. And something happened, like I I think it was like a gold dipped or something, and it started to oxidize the change your finger? No, no, no, no. Just like the underneath, so it looked really dark. And so I looked at getting everything replaced. Yeah. And then I looked at, well, what if I just kept my old ring and kept it for my children someday? If they were to want it. What if I just does on my own cheaper and bigger and sparklier, and that's what we did. I love that feeling. So I have, you know, I yes, my first one was, you know, an actually mind diamond. This one is not, and I'm okay with it. I don't care. Yeah, who cares? I mean, our marriage is real.

SPEAKER_00 6:49

Your marriage is real.

SPEAKER_01 6:51

My marriage is very real, but you know. But like Elena's digress. Ring is gorgeous. It is gorgeous, and she is so happy. Well, okay, the surprise element is not so much of a surprise when I let you in on the big secret. Which is she's getting married in December. How many months is that to plan a wedding? We are less than five. Oh my gosh.

SPEAKER_00 7:19

Like, look, I'm I'm sweating for you. I am sweating so for myself. So we're okay. It depends on in five months. You can anyone can pull off a wedding in five months, depending on what you want to do. What size? What are we looking at? Are we looking at a shooting?

SPEAKER_01 7:35

Okay, so so this is where we kind of like the DJ, the band. I I kinda, okay. So if we back up to maybe okay, if we back up eight weeks ago. Okay, great. Okay, let's just back up like that's approximately. I don't know if that's right or not. I'm just my my frame of reference is, you know, a couple months back. I knew that they were planning getting engaged in the summer. Okay. So that was not a surprise to me. Obviously, you don't go through all this pre-engagement stuff if that you don't plan on doing that. Yes. And I said, So when do you think you'll get married? And I was hearing her mouth say next summer or next year. I was hearing that out of her mouth. My intuition was like, it is not that. And I feel like I've told you that off right.

SPEAKER_00 8:19

Yeah. Off right.

SPEAKER_01 8:21

Like, I am like, I feel like this is going to become faster. I don't think so. I don't think so. And if you know my daughter, you know that she is not a, she's not over the top. Well, my oldest daughter, anyways. She's not over the top. She's not a look at me.

SPEAKER_00 8:38

She's not a which is which makes her ring perfect. She's classic, simplistic. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 8:45

Like she's not a big attention seeker, I guess is what I'm saying. So she had said, I think I want a really small wedding.

SPEAKER_00 8:52

Love that for her.

SPEAKER_01 8:53

So love that for her, and love that for my budget.

SPEAKER_00 8:56

Yes. But what is small?

SPEAKER_01 8:57

So I was like, what does small look like? And she's like, immediate family, very close friends. Love that. And so I'm like, are we talking like less than 50? And she was like, Yeah. Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_00 9:09

So I'm like, This was eight weeks ago.

SPEAKER_01 9:11

So this is like, no, like eight weeks ago, it was like we still didn't know when. Okay. Okay, great. So I was like, okay, small wedding, small wedding. That's kind of like what she wants. And this is just kind of passing conversation. This isn't like a sit down. Sit down, let's plan everything out. She, and she never said anything pointed to me. I just could not shake. I was like, just had that still small voice in my head. Was that God? Was that, you know, like just Holy Spirit nudging of like, I just, I'm just preparing you that I don't trust this timeline. And so even my husband was like, they're gonna get married next year, you know, like we have a whole year, you know. And I'm like, and I would say things like, do we do? Do we really have a year? And anyway, so we speed up beginning of June. Okay. Okay. And Elaine and I and my husband kind of have an argument. Okay. And we listen, you argue with your kids. Like, this is not a like things, you know, they're 22, they're doing life their own way. And we kind of had a kind of like a moment of like, hey, you live in our house, you take up half of our house, you use our resources, I buy your food, you know, like we do all the things for you. And I understand that, you know, like you've got friends and you have a life and you have a partner and you want to do all these things and be all these places, but like there's still home responsibilities. Yeah. Like every you live in the house, everybody has chores.

SPEAKER_00 10:42

Yep.

SPEAKER_01 10:42

I don't care if you didn't participate in eating the dishes, like if dishes are still part of your chores, you're still going to do them. Like, I need you to, I need to mean to not ride your tail. Like, I just need you to step up and do and do something every once in a while. You know, there was kind of that. And her siblings are struggling a little bit because they have always had so much access to her.

SPEAKER_00 11:06

It's gonna change. It already is changing.

SPEAKER_01 11:08

And this is, and and and we've watched it change throughout college, you know, like, but this is like, so there's no, it's now when not she's not at home on her own. She's home with well, now fiance, but we're talking, you know, yeah, you know, now we're talking like five weeks back. We're just like, I it's really important that you spend time because this is fleeting. This time you have with your siblings is fleeting before it changes. Yeah. And we're looking forward to the changes, but it's coming really fast for us. Yeah. So, you know, when your sister's kind of nitpicking at you, you know, like she wants to borrow your stuff. And they kind of had like a big sister fight of like, you take my stuff without asking. Well, you're never home for me to ask, you know, like the, you know, typical as siblings do. But I said to Elena, uh, you just understand we're irritated because we love you so much and we're and it's hard, and it's, you know, we're not sad for you because we're excited for these next things. But I'm like, please make sure you're taking time to just kind of like realize that it's an adjustment for everyone. So there was kind of that. So we kind of have that, and somehow that conversation turned into oh, hey, I also want to get married in December.

SPEAKER_00 12:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 12:25

So okay, at this point, there's no ring on the finger, there's no all of these things.

SPEAKER_00 12:29

But we now know. And so But the date has moved up, even without the ring.

SPEAKER_01 12:34

So we had a we had a date on the calendar that we knew things are gonna happen before there was a a ring on the finger. The ring had been ordered. He had Matt had already been asked permission by the fiance. So we had been crazy trying to plan weddings and book things in total secret, which ended up being sort of a nightmare. It was like, hey, you know, I was trying to like, do we do it at my mom and dad's church because that's where I got married? And so I think there was some like nostalgia of wanting to get married when I got married. And then he was, and then that date didn't work out. And then it was like, well, then we'll go to his church. And then so I went to tour the church. And I'll just be like just super transparent, you know, getting planning in five, six form, whatever the short time period is, there is not an Elena wedding fund.

SPEAKER_00 13:20

Well, and the good news about December, typically a church is already decorated for Christmas.

SPEAKER_01 13:25

So, but then we went to look at their church, and there is no shade to this church, but where they wanted to have the, you know, like and the church was wonderful to say, like, you can use the space for a small reception. But we looked and it was like, this is not gonna hold more than like 75 people.

SPEAKER_00 13:41

Oh, wait, but you wanted to pay what you know, 50 people.

SPEAKER_01 13:44

Okay, well, then we started like making names, and then I was like, okay, that is more than 75. Well, probably everyone will come. Like the list is like 83. And then I'm like, oh, but we have to this. And I was like, you didn't factor in like some family. So then he didn't really want to cut things down. She didn't want to cut, you know, and then so she it was it was a whole thing. And so our small wedding of went from 50 to 75 to 100 to a 125-ish to I think the last count of like, and it gets it gets cut this week. It gets cut this week, but like the list was like 183, and I was like, nope. That's not that's not a small wedding. That is not a small wedding. So the cuts are happening this week. If you think you're getting invited and you don't, it's not because we don't love you, it's because I'm not made out of money. But truly, and you know, space-wise, it was just like so anyway, so that we're supposed to be at their church, and so then I panicked and I was like, I was like, don't tell your fiance this yet, you know, not to keep secrets. I'm like, would you be open to I'm like, if you think he wants to have a larger wedding, which is the vibe that I was getting.

SPEAKER_02 14:52

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 14:53

He was settling for something smaller, but I think he wanted something larger. He didn't, there was cuts he didn't want to make. Although Elena was like, let's do it smaller. Let's elope. That was on the table for a while.

SPEAKER_02 15:02

I love that too.

SPEAKER_01 15:03

And then I thought, I just, you're kind of among the first of your friends to get married. She's had a couple, yeah, but like not the majority. So I was like, I don't want her to go back in a couple years. This is this all of her friends kind of go through this process and be like, I wish I would have done that. Yeah. And I just didn't, or her siblings get married, and you know, like it just I wanted if she wanted to experience it, I wanted her to have that. And she was having total decision fatigue, like right off the bat. Yeah. And I was like, here's what we'll do. You tell me the things you really care about. Okay. You tell me what you really care about, who you want to be there, and I will do the legwork for you and then bring it to you. And you like either like yay or nay it. Great. I'll go back to the drawing board. Like, if that helps your decision fatigue, great. That helps me stay within my budget. That all, you know, and that also helps you not to feel like you have to let's narrow it down to two things instead of 20 things. Yeah. So she was like, they were all okay with all that. So then I went back to our church and I was like, hey, I'm sorry we weren't in on this in the beginning, but like, is it available? And you know, like, yeah, it's available. And so a mutual friend of ours is like, well, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna like schedule it. And then sudden someone comes in and stops and is like, you can't do it that way. You have to go through the official channels.

SPEAKER_00 16:16

Oh, yeah, with the wedding.

SPEAKER_01 16:17

The wedding stuff. So the question is, are they gonna make them do their wedding process? So that was the big thing. Like, are you gonna do because they've done all of these things and so you're working? And it is a lot. It is a lot, which is great. I mean, but there's nothing wrong with it. So they've already gone through one process so then they kind of went through and asked and said, This is the process that we're doing. You know, we've been with, you know, basically these premarital things since April. We would like to continue with this. This is kind of the curriculum, this is what we're doing. And they said, you know what, you're fine to stay with that. Go off. Which is amazing. But we want you to do this program that we do building blocks, I think it was called Building Blocks for marriage, yeah.

SPEAKER_00 16:56

Doug and I caught it for years and years and years and years.

SPEAKER_01 16:58

They're doing that story program, which nobody was opposed to that. Yeah, it's like then you could be like, but also the person that they are closest to in the church and wanted to marry them is now leaving. I but could he come back and it's still So then we're like, hey, can he come back? And so then that was a thing. And it was all that being said, I think we're all good. And so now I'm like, so Elena's kind of like handing me, like, you know, like not handing me, but like screenshotting the messages of like, hey, this is where we are. And I was like, could you just email back? Yes, you are booked for December 5th. It is happening December 5th, nobody else is gonna get on the calendar. Like, like just make sure that like you get this actual confirmation. I'm like, and then figure out who at our specific site is the wedding person. So I'm like logistically, like I'm talking to the right person. Oh that's right. You you prep for marriage and let me prep for the wedding.

SPEAKER_00 17:51

Fantastic. So that is a beautiful space where where where the the weddings actually happen.

SPEAKER_01 17:56

Yes. So now we're gonna so we've now we're like at our third, like our third location in five weeks. Love that. But it's okay because this is this what feels right. This is where she grew up. Yeah, this is where we feel like home.

SPEAKER_00 18:11

So it's a gorgeous space where where they have weddings at at the church you go to. It's gorgeous. Yeah, yep.

SPEAKER_01 18:18

So I feel like I know, I feel like I want to knock on some wood and there's nothing any like directly near me December 5th. We're a book for the chapel.

SPEAKER_00 18:27

Oh, I'm so happy for you guys.

SPEAKER_01 18:29

So yeah. So if you have it.

SPEAKER_00 18:32

Does that feel like big relief?

SPEAKER_01 18:35

Yeah, I mean, like I said, it's just this is hard. Like all of it, this is hard. And I will tell you that I I would totally move some of their Christmas decorations. It's I know. Um can I get away with that? I don't know. Winter leaning wedding. I don't know. As long as they move back out. Yeah, it's like kind of like the week after Thanksgiving, you know, like so Yeah, it should be decorated. I think Thanksgiving is late this year. I don't even know. It is such a cluster of time. It's gonna go so fast.

SPEAKER_00 19:05

It it will go fast. Like it's like in a blink of the eye. And then she's gonna be married and she's gonna be out of your house and really wonder.

SPEAKER_01 19:12

I don't just crazy crazy, crazy, crazy. So I we went to a graduation party for family la last, well, yesterday. Yesterday, Saturday. And so we walk in and people were like, Holy crap, you're half your size. Which is amazing because you just posted about this. Your kid is getting married, like I feel like so much has happened since we have seen you. And if you've seen all of that is true.

SPEAKER_00 19:36

It was like Well, I think like, especially with weight loss, if you see somebody every single day or every single week, sometimes it's hard to tell that they're losing weight because you just you just see them until like you see a before and after picture. Then you're like, oh my gosh, you can't. I did.

SPEAKER_01 19:51

I did post on my socials this week or because 4th of July was kind of like my big like come to Jesus moment of like looking at myself in the picture and I was like, you have to make big changes. Yes. And now I am around 80 pounds of weight loss, but then I'm done losing weight now.

SPEAKER_00 20:08

But when you have people who haven't seen you anytime, but they haven't seen me. It is like a jaw-dropping moment.

SPEAKER_01 20:14

Well, I will say I saw you today and I haven't seen you for what three weeks? Maybe four. I mean, I don't like my jaw was dropped. I was like, you look incredible. Not that I didn't think you look incredible for, but I know how hard you've been working. And I'm like seeing like the I don't, it doesn't even matter what a number is, but I'm like, your body has shifted like crazy.

SPEAKER_00 20:35

Because my number still, I mean, I've lost 40 pounds, which is for me huge, but I still I don't want to say still, but I'm like one I weighed in yesterday and I was at 174. And so I don't think I look like I weigh 174. Maybe this video is gonna tell me differently, but I but the weight definitely has shifted somewhere else, or it has turned into muscle because I do work out every single, not every single day, I work out four times a week. So I'm not losing the the number as as much as I was hoping for because I would love to be like my ultimate goal is like 150. 140 would be freaking amazing. I don't know if I can do that, but I'm hoping.

SPEAKER_01 21:14

I my goal was 145, and that was just got me to like the very tip of the normal and yeah edge of the BMI scale, which I know some people like doesn't matter. But for me, I wanted to be able to go to the doctor and not see obese or overweight on like my my chart stuff.

SPEAKER_00 21:31

Because I go to I go to the OB in a couple months because I just scheduled that appointment because I always forget about that one. I'm overdue, and and I don't want that to be on my chart. Same reason I'm like, I went away and be like, look at me.

SPEAKER_01 21:44

I just it was just one of those things like when you have lived in a different reality for so long and you're so close to it.

SPEAKER_00 21:50

Because when you open up your my chart and it says obese, it sucks. And mine says.

SPEAKER_01 22:00

I just want to feel normal. I just want. And it's not even so much. It's not like I'm going around going, hi, my name is Steph. I have a normal BMI. Like that's like if that's not how we introduce myself. It was just one of those things that I've just wanted so weirdly, badly for myself of it. Just wanted that.

SPEAKER_00 22:17

I would for and I can say this because I've seen it in you too. Man, it's the it's a confidence booster. Yeah, I know. One of my coworkers who she is, she started taking GLP 1-2, and she's going very quickly, like losing weight very quickly. And for for health reasons, and she like comes up to me, she's like, I just have a like a sass in my step now. I am just very sassy.

SPEAKER_01 22:42

I don't know if I'm not sure. And I'm like my own, but there is a pep in my step for sure. And I love that. But you know, it's funny. So I like I I said the 4th of July, you know, like get back to the family stuff. But I had posted on my socials like the picture that I took that it was like, okay, something's gotta change. Yeah. And this one, and I started getting messages. And I have listen, obviously, if you've listened to this podcast, if you follow me on any of my socials, I have not hidden the fact that I've had GLP1 help. No. But I had one person respond and be like, oh, so you just took the skinny shot. And I'm like, I wanted to hit him through the screen. I'm like, no, no, no, no, no. It so much work has been put into this. And if I could have lost it on my own, I would have because I've tried to do this many, many times.

SPEAKER_00 23:35

I before I took even started the shot, I was once again working out four times a week. I was eating, like eating very healthy and could not lose the weight.

SPEAKER_01 23:47

And I will tell you, sitting next to her, she is in shorts, and I don't know if I've ever seen her in shorts.

SPEAKER_00 23:53

I have not worn shorts in years because I do not like myself in shorts, but I'll I don't either.

SPEAKER_01 23:57

I like myself in shorts now. But I'm also tan. She is tan. She is back from the beach. I'm like old school tin and I'm just gonna be able to do it.

SPEAKER_00 24:05

Yeah, like I sat on the beach, old school, like let me burn. And yes, I know, I know skin cancer is bad. My mom had melanoma stage four. It I understand that, which is why I go to the dermatologist. I just got back from dermatology. You got your clean bill of health. I got my clean bill of health, so I'm like, let me bring it up.

SPEAKER_01 24:21

But she is like golden and wearing shorts, and I'm like, She's a pull, not only is she wearing shorts, she's pulling up her shorts because they're baggy.

SPEAKER_00 24:31

And I'm like, Because they're old shorts that I haven't worn in a while, because clearly I don't wear short, I don't wear shorts. It's like they're the ones that you like have in your drawer just in case. You have you've had those for sure. Just in case. Are we please say we're recording? Oh yeah, we're good.

unknown 24:46

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 24:47

26 minutes in. We have checked to see if we're recording.

SPEAKER_00 24:51

Yeah. Because we remember that remember the one episode? Professionals. Professionals. Professionals. But it was the well, let me see if these fit.

SPEAKER_01 24:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 24:59

And I'm like, they do, but they're even a little bigger. So I'll take it. I went to I went to the the gap outlet and had to get new pants and new shirts. Yeah, it's a good feeling. I which I love the gap outlet for that reason because I'm if you don't live okay, so we live in northern Kentucky, greater Cincinnati area.

SPEAKER_01 25:16

We have something called the Gap Outlet. That is not like going to an outlet mall and there being a gap. It is the gap clearance center. True true. Where it's like the you get, is it gap old Navy Banana Republican Athleta? Athleta.

SPEAKER_00 25:31

Athleta. And there's one other brand that I forget what it is. But yes, all of them are.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

You get yes, it's so it's all the clearance items. So I mean, like, honestly, like I think it's Banana Republic. You look great. I I'm just saying, she walked in and I was like jaw down to the floor. And it's like, I haven't seen you in three weeks, but I'm like, whoa.

SPEAKER_00 25:50

It was, it's and it's like the 40-pound mark. Yeah. Like, and I don't know if something finally clicked in my body was like, okay, we're gonna shift the weight to where it needs to be. As I said, I haven't lost the amount of weight that I've wanted to, but I am definitely like if I were to measure myself, it would, you would definitely be able to see a difference. Yeah. And in where I am. I mean, I'm way more confident than I was six months ago.

SPEAKER_01 26:19

I don't know if we need my mouth to be any more confident than it is, but but you're right, you're right. I mean, I will, I mean, I've if I'm just gonna be so transparent, one of the things that has held me back from some of the God-sized dreams that I've had, yeah, or I feel like has been shared with me, whether that is speaking or writing or elements of social media or even like us videoing this podcast, is has been, I just don't feel good about myself. Yeah. And you don't listen, you don't need to be a certain weight to talk about Jesus. No, you don't. You really don't, you really don't. But I it's just crazy the worldly insecurities that we have.

SPEAKER_00 27:05

And but you feel good. I I feel I feel great. I mean, we were talking about this. I keep I I've said that multiple times, but today is exactly a year ago when I was announced that I was no longer going to be a pastor. So it's been exactly one year. That's wild. Isn't that crazy? And if I look back at the at the last year on how I am, what my life is, how God has worked in me, it's been it's been a freaking crazy roller coaster. And through it all, through the pain, the heartache, and everything, man, I am I am doing freaking great right now.

SPEAKER_01 27:46

You are. And if you've listened through the entirety of this, I have heard people say, and I have said this to you as well, like, Casey got her spark back. I I but it was that movie, like Stella got her groove back, Casey got her groove back.

SPEAKER_00 28:02

I I mean, I was in a freaking dark place. Yeah. I and I I get it. And like lessons that I have learned that even God has taught me over the last year, especially when it comes to a job, because we can get our identity, and we've talked about this before, so wrapped up in what we do and who we are, and that becomes our whole entire identity. So when that is taken away, it can be devastating. So when like over the last year, things that I have learned is one, my job is not my identity.

SPEAKER_01 28:35

That that that was like the biggest one that I I have learned. And that's so easy for anyone in any field. I don't think like that's a ministry specific. I mean, you just get wrapped up in what you're good at and what you do. It's just like it when it's your routine, like the people that you work with are your people.

SPEAKER_00 28:51

So when people ask you, what do you do? You immediately go to your job. What do you do? Who are you? Like you immediately go to your job, and that becomes your whole itinerary.

SPEAKER_01 28:59

I well, your itinerary of your daily schedule does kind of lend to who your identity is, I guess.

SPEAKER_00 29:07

It does.

SPEAKER_01 29:07

Try and make that right for you.

SPEAKER_00 29:09

It becomes your identity, which also makes me like led me to my other lesson that I've learned is that everybody is replaceable.

SPEAKER_01 29:20

Rough lesson.

SPEAKER_00 29:21

That is a hard lesson to learn. Doesn't matter how amazing you are at your job, you know, what status you are, if you even started the company or not started the company, everybody is replaceable. And you you think that, oh, they're never going to, you know, not just me, not me personally, but you know, they're never gonna let me go. I'm never gonna get fired. I'm never gonna leave because I am that important. Guess what? No, you're not.

SPEAKER_01 29:45

No. I mean, I would say that's even true in like friend groups and that kind of stuff. I mean, like, you know, things shift and they adapt and they move on. And but a year later, would you say these changes have been for you?

SPEAKER_00 30:00

Oh, yes. What do you mean by for me? Okay.

SPEAKER_01 30:03

Before I say yes.

SPEAKER_00 30:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 30:05

Well, I'm just like, I do as someone who sat on this couch with you for, you know, a year. Well, we kind of we actually kind of started talking about this a little bit like a year ago. I mean, like, I think we threw it out in a text, and then we had like a like a month or so that where we didn't actually say anything. We were still like chatting and she's like, Yeah, I want to meet with you. I'm not ready. I'm not ready. I'm not ready.

SPEAKER_00 30:26

Uh yeah, I did that for multiple times.

SPEAKER_01 30:27

But that's okay.

SPEAKER_00 30:28

Man, it I wasn't moving.

SPEAKER_01 30:29

But you were okay. But what I'm saying is in that stage, in the beginning, if you were to listen to the beginning of this podcast, you were not only just in a dark place, it was a things have been done to me.

SPEAKER_00 30:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 30:45

And I my feelings are really hurt, and I'm not negating any of these things because Lord knows my feelings have been hurt about many, many things. Yes. So I get it. But when you look back now, do you feel like these things intervened in you like for you? Like like do you see the blessings in it on the other side?

SPEAKER_00 31:09

Oh, yes. I still don't fully under I still don't fully know what God's plans are for me. Uh join join the club because nobody does. Nobody does. I still don't fully understand the the whole reason. And I don't I'm I'm never supposed to understand the whole reason, but I totally trust God and believe that he has this purpose for me. And in order for me to do the things that he wants me to do, I needed to, I needed to say bye to where I was.

SPEAKER_01 31:42

And I wish that I was more technologically savvy to find like the pieces of the podcast we were talking, you know, like, you know, like what we were learning in that season because you healed and grieved in real time with us.

SPEAKER_00 31:52

Oh, I did. And it was a while to to where like I said to you, I texted you, was I texted you last week? I hear me when I texted you all the time, saying that like I think my last piece of this for my complete for me to be able to release it all is for me to actually go to a service at my at the church where I was a pastor at. Just for me to be like, okay, I can, it's, it's, I'm good. And I'm still working through that with God because I feel like God might be pushing me, but it's like, is it God pushing me or is it me pushing myself? And I have to realize, you know, because also at the same time, I'm freaking good. So if me walking in, is that gonna set me back? And I I don't know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 32:40

I don't think it's gonna set you back.

SPEAKER_00 32:41

That's hey, I I've been wishing people happy birthdays all the time, people on staff. And that's the other thing. That's like one lesson that I also learned is no matter how long you've been at a company and these and people who you think are your friends, because I thought I had dozens and dozens of friends, staff and non-staff, and turns out that's not that's not the case. And so you really have to be careful of who you're you're close and who you surround yourself with, because when when something happens, who's gonna stand up for you? I would say of all the people who I thought I was close with during my nine years or 18 total, nine years on staff, eight, you know, there is less than five who who still who I still have a relationship with.

SPEAKER_01 33:37

And it's hard because it's kind of that out of sight, out of mind. I don't think it's like it's not that people don't care about you. You're not on some blacklist. No, no, no, no.

SPEAKER_00 33:45

And I agree with that. But it's also the understanding that I did the same thing.

SPEAKER_01 33:48

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 33:49

Because when somebody it is, when somebody leaves, it isn't out of sight, out of mind. And so if you are, if where you work or or where you go is everything is wrapped up into that, your friendships, your community, your your everything, it all of a sudden is taken away, man, it is it it is devastating. So one of the one conversation I had was with somebody when all this was going down was she their their biggest concern for me was my community. Like, what are you gonna do? Like, these are all your friends. And I'm like, Yes and no, because I have a great group of girlfriends who've been my friends for since I I've talked about this multiple times since I've been little, and I am so grateful for them because you know the you need to make sure you have friends who are the ones that you go to when shit goes down, who are the ones who are gonna show up? Because the ones that you think they're going to aren't the ones that that actually happen. Tough lessons. Tough lessons, great lessons that God has given me. Yeah, but I am I mean I hate going through shit. I mean, I hate going through hard times. It is a pain in the ass, and I don't wish it upon anybody. No, but also at the same time, it is the only time that I grow. It is the only time that I am closest to God. And as much as it sucks to be in the world.

SPEAKER_01 35:16

And close might mean hanging on by a thread.

SPEAKER_00 35:18

Yeah, and close might be sometimes of like, God, why do I even trust you if this is where I am in my life? Like, why why do I keep saying, Okay, God, I trust you, I trust you, I trust you, but yet all this crap keeps happening. And and so, you know, when when we say we the the mustard seed mountain of faith, you know, help me help me with my unbelief, which is one of my favorite Bible verses, you know, I do believe, but help me with my unbelief. My unbelief was way out my belief for a very, very long time. And looking back a year later, I mean, man, there's some hard lessons. I'm glad I learned them. And I'm doing freaking amazing right now.

SPEAKER_01 36:02

I I can see.

SPEAKER_00 36:05

I mean, part of it was health. Part of it was because when I was a year ago, I was at the heaviest that I've ever been. I was stressed, I was all these things. And sometimes, you know, maybe that's part of it is God was like, you need to get rid of all of these stressors in your life and focus on your health because you're going down a dangerous, a dangerous path. And you think you don't realize it until you I mean, once again, you don't realize it until a year later. And then you look back and you're like, oh my gosh, I was looking back a year at pictures of me a year, a year ago on our vacation, because our vacations are always the same time every single year. And last year, I all I did on the beach is cried.

SPEAKER_01 36:45

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 36:46

For 24 hours, seven days straight. All I did was cry.

SPEAKER_01 36:50

Well, we can say that the weight you've lost, like the you were carrying emotional weight and and physical weight. And I think as you've shed some of the physical weight, you've grown and healed, and you have let go some of that emotional weight too. So when I say you look lighter and brighter, I this is not just about, I mean, yes, you look fantastic physically, but I can see there's a massive emotional weight that's been lifted off of you.

SPEAKER_00 37:15

100%. I I so much. I mean, when I say I feel great, I'm not just saying physically I feel great. Yeah. Like emotionally, spiritually, I mean, I feel you're I feel fantastic. Yeah. I'm ready. I like it's like, okay, God, I'm ready. Give me, give me, give me my next plan. Give me my next plan.

SPEAKER_01 37:34

And that's on healing, where it was like, I I wish I, like I said, I wish I could go back and find snippets. I mean, I'm sure we can. But you were like, I but I think I'm still crying. Distinctly remember like we couldn't even bring up things without tears in our eyes and just kind of that lump in our throat of like, I don't know, it's next, maybe nothing's gonna happen. God just used all of me. There's nothing left, you know? And we would say, I know there's more, and then it was, but then then the very next sentence was, but maybe there's not, you know. I mean, it's that kind of ee or it is woe is me.

SPEAKER_00 38:07

Woe is me. I'm and I man, I lived in and I loved and sometimes that becomes your identity. Like that that whole depression, and I'm not gonna lie, I'll be honest, that probably was my identity for a good six months of the woe is me.

SPEAKER_01 38:26

I well, I don't think everybody does it with a microphone.

SPEAKER_00 38:29

True.

SPEAKER_01 38:30

But I you see it, you see people who go through tremendous loss, loss of a loved one, loss of a child, loss of a relationship, loss of a job. Like these are things that just they when they become part of something, they're part of the core of who you are. Yeah. And when it's not anymore, when something of that changes, like it just yeah, we're adaptable. We are moldable, but man, it doesn't feel like it. It just feels like we've lost limbs, doesn't it?

SPEAKER_00 39:04

Yeah, and and it takes you have to go through the process. You have to go through through the process of grieving and healing, and it's for it's not always quick. No, no, it's not. And you know, even your process of losing weight, uh, it wasn't quick.

SPEAKER_01 39:23

It feels quick sometimes, but it but I also know how much work I put in. So like when so, you know, when people were really like, Oh, you're just taking you just taking a shot, and I'm like, Well, you know, that shot made my insulin resistance like work. Yeah. And then allowed me to process things that allowed me to take uh, yeah, initially to help me get a little bit of weight off. It helped me then be able to exercise because I couldn't do it before. People would say, like, do you want to come and join me? And I'd be like, for any kind of workout, and I'm like, I don't have no endurance. I my joints hurt. Like, I I can't, I physically can't do that. And now when someone says, Hey, do you want to join me for Pilates? I'm like, Yeah, I think I do. And now there's there's things I'm still not strong at.

SPEAKER_00 40:06

Oh, yeah, same. I hate Pilates. I all the people who love Pilates, I work out and the she'll put she'll put Pilates every once in a while in our workouts, and I'm like, I hate you. It's hard. It hurts, it's really hard. Uh yeah, I cuss through it.

SPEAKER_01 40:22

Oh well, I mean, like I said, I I don't know what the workout for me is going to be. I mean, I have been so thankful to just I really I love my kettlebells. I I you have to find what works. I I love walking. I, you know, I know that I need to do more strength training, and that still is really intimidating for me. But I I for the first time in my life in these last few months, it's like I feel physically capable of doing some of the things to to get to places where I can do new things. You know what I'm really excited about?

SPEAKER_00 40:59

Mother of the Bride dress. You know, I thought about it. You know, you you don't have to like wear like the Can I just tell you? Like the old maiden ones that look like the old, the old what is it?

SPEAKER_01 41:12

This is gonna sound so vain, but like as we started doing this, I I actually looked at my husband and I was like, thank God I lost weight this year. Can you imagine if she sprung this on me? You have five months to lose weight, and you have five months, and it's like if five, like listen, after when I'd been losing weight for five months, even though I physically felt like I looked better and I was starting to feel better, no one knew, no one saw it, nobody said anything. That's just just what it was, just it was what it was. Oh my gosh, yeah, I know. Not to sound vain, but like I was like, oh, I'm really glad because I feel like I can be comfortable in my skin for her.

SPEAKER_00 41:49

Yes. So I do have a question regarding GLP1s, even though I'm on two. I haven't because I haven't gotten that far yet. Because you've now reached your goal weight. So does that mean that you start weaning off?

SPEAKER_01 42:01

It's a good question. So I've been having conversations with the doctor. I don't know, I've shared here many, many times. I have PCOS called PMOS, uh, which, you know, all the things. This has, I don't want to say nearly reversed because you know, I'm still growing chin hair like a mofo. Like, yeah, I still have the increased testosterone. I'm still dealing with some of that stuff. However, if you're a dude and don't want to hear this, this is you know, sorry, skip 30 seconds. I was bleeding on average 17 days a month, sometimes more. What? I was having two periods every single month. They were lasting anywhere between seven and ten days. And I wasn't ablation. I mean That's what I'm hoping for. But that wasn't just that wasn't just that. So that was just like the physical part of like the actual periods. But yes, I had like the insane hair growth. Like I could be the amazing bearded lady if I didn't wasn't like best friends with the little uh finishing touch thing. I mean, I was waxing my chin twice a week. Oh wow. Like insane. And then my insulin resistance, my body acts like it's diabetic. Yeah, but I don't have a high A1C, which is what would have gotten me on these medicines beforehand. So, anyways, I digress. Going back to that. Other than I'm still having the the hair growth, the other things have resolved itself. So it's which is life-changing for me. Because if you would totally go off of it, then all that would then all those things would come back because I I don't know why this isn't fully covered for what I have, but the medical trials all show such tremendous promise for it. So I was trusting that science and hoping it would work for me. And it has. So metabolically, it has changed me in ways that I don't want to go off. Now We're gonna try staying on the same dose for a while. I'll try and stretch it to like every 10 days. Oh, nice. Maybe see if I can get up to every taking it every other week. Okay. And then we can try. If I'm doing well that, maybe we can try and lower my dose and see. But when those other things start coming back, then everything's gonna come back. Oh, yeah. Because this medicine, yes, many people use this strictly for weight loss. For me, I knew my body was broken in a way that the same way, if you have high cholesterol, you take medicine to help it.

SPEAKER_02 44:32

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 44:33

I wish my insurance would cover this, but it's not. But I found something that has made my body work the way it's supposed to. So right now we're gonna stay on it, but I they don't want me losing any more weight. Now I can lose more weight. I mean, technically there's a range that more weight loss is allowed. I'm actually really not comfortable losing any more weight. No, you look fantastic. I've got a little bit of a belly, but I've had three kids and I'm not That's never gonna go away. I'm not paying to have it cut off.

SPEAKER_00 45:00

It's just unless somebody wants to sponsor us.

SPEAKER_01 45:02

Shoot, yeah. If you want to do that, great. But I that's not gonna be part of my budget. Not unless I win the the mega ball mega with it. I'd have to remember how to play the Powerball or one of those things. Yeah. But yeah, I mean, unless something like that happens, or you know, there's a generous listener who's just like, I want to do this for you. And I'm like, well, who am I to look a gift horse in the mouth? But nobody's coming knocking on my door with that offer.

SPEAKER_00 45:24

So I will always have that over here.

SPEAKER_01 45:26

So it's it's okay. And I'm not, it's not to where it was. And I'm learning to love the body that I have, and it's a lot easier to do when I can move it. Yeah. I mean, just just to be just very honest, like when I couldn't move it and I was in pain, and oh, not to mention the joint pain and inflammation that like my particular cause issues were were causing. So yeah, there's that. But oh, let me go back to I see my family yesterday. Oh, yeah, yeah. So these are I see some my cousins, some my aunts, one of my uncles, and so I kind of walk in and I I some I mean, obviously I I posted a picture on like Facebook, which I really hadn't done.

SPEAKER_00 46:09

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 46:10

The entire year I was losing weight. I mean, I maybe have updated my profile pictures. You just kind of see like my upper half or something, and I would be people like, oh, Steph, you look great, and I'd be like, Thank you. But that was just kind of that. This was the first time I've publicly came out and thought, Oh, I'm I'm I I've actively been trying. But so I some of my family knew, some of my family doesn't do social media. I walk in, my aunt's like, oh my gosh, there's like half of you. And I'm like, I know. She's like, You look so great, not that you didn't look great. You know, like and they all want to preface it, like, not that you didn't look great before. And I was like, but it's okay, you can say, I I feel better. Yes. I feel better inside and out. And that's not on being vain. Like, to be honest, when I hit 165, I felt like a brand new person. Yeah. Which is kind of like I think where you are.

SPEAKER_00 46:52

174, I feel great.

SPEAKER_01 46:54

And I would say you look like what I looked like at when I kind of was in the 160s. It was just like that's when like things started to shift a little bit. And I was like, and you may be a couple inches taller than I am, too. So that's probably the Yeah. I'm what I'm 5'4. Okay. Well, I say I'm 5'4, but you're taller. So we're not gonna actually like go back to back and measure. I don't know how tall I am. Okay, but all that being said, you know, so she's like, Oh, you look great. And so then, you know, you know, my uncle comes up to me and he's not seen me, and you know, he's like, Whoa. And he goes, I can tell you feel better. And it was such a nice compliment you don't usually get from a man. He was just like, I love that.

SPEAKER_00 47:32

Like, I can tell you feel better.

SPEAKER_01 47:33

I can tell you feel better. It wasn't based on my looks, it wasn't based on I can tell you feel better, which was just such a way to say, like, I you have your pep in your step, you have your sass back, you have you feel good. Like, I can tell you feel better. And I was like, I really do.

SPEAKER_02 47:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 47:51

And I was like, man, that's how I maybe I should take like compliments. That's what I should have said to you. I could tell you feel better. And I was like, You look hot. I'll take that all day long. Thank you. Oh my gosh. I like looking hot. But we laughed so hard. So, you know, so they're saying, like, okay, you look great. Okay, let's move on. Give us the dish about like, do we like this boy? Like, when does she get married? Like, do all of these things because Elena wasn't with me yesterday. So they were like, we were, you know, it was like a little dish session, and you know, they're like, Are we gonna be invited? You know, like all of these things.

SPEAKER_00 48:21

Oh my gosh, how scary is that when people start asking you if you're gonna be invited.

SPEAKER_01 48:24

I don't know. Well, that's a whole different topic. Whole different topic. Maybe I maybe I'll be emotionally prepared to talk about that in a few weeks. Maybe not. Probably not. So anyway, I say, you know, it's hard because Elena doesn't care about, like, she cares about the marriage, she doesn't c care about the wedding, which is incredible. Yes. Right? This this is the dream scenario. But also, I looked at my aunt and I'm saying, like, I can't throw a janky wedding. No. And she kind of looks at me like kind of cockeyed. She goes, What did you say? I said, I don't want to throw a janky wedding. Yeah. And so then I start to explain, like, I'm like cheap, like put together kind of like poorly, like, you know, like, and I'm like, we are in such a time crunch. It's like, it's like this has to be this has to be done fast. And oh like florist cake, all of that. Like all the things. And so you know, we're chatting about that. And she goes, I've never heard the word janky before. And I've heard the word janky like three times this week. And I was like, is that like a Midwest word? Uh janky is. Janky? Yeah, that's definitely what we say. I I just like I'm and if it's if this comes from like a bad place, as if if there's a bad meaning to that, I've never heard it, but I mean, like, you know, like correct me if I'm wrong. But like, so I was trying to explain what janky meant. And so this is so funny. And I told her I was gonna talk about this today. Oh god, I love this. Did you Google it? No, I didn't. Maybe I should have. But for whatever reason, even when I started explaining it, I don't know if it was loud or she just stopped listening to me. Okay, but she ends up looking, I I think she looks at my cousin's daughter, who's like maybe 15. Okay, okay, and she looks at her with the biggest smile on her face and she goes, Maddie, you are so janky. Did he go?

SPEAKER_00 50:20

What did Maddie know what that word meant?

SPEAKER_01 50:23

Yeah, Maddie, like we all know what the word janky means. Why would she say that? Because she didn't know what it was. She's like, she just stopped listening to me when we were explaining it. I said, Dolly. And I told her, I said, I don't normally call everybody out, but I was like, I'm gonna call you out, doll. That is not a word, you just somebody I was like, that's not what that means. And she goes, Why? What does it mean? I said, It means cheap. And she her face goes, white as a ghost, and then she starts laughing. And I was like, Maddie, I think she thinks it meant like bougie. Yes, not janky does not mean bougie, does not mean the same thing. And so I have my other cousin, her daughter was there. She's like, you know, like for like janky, I like to use the word boof.

unknown 51:05

Oh.

SPEAKER_01 51:06

And I was like, I'm learning all these new things. I don't know. I've never heard of boof.

SPEAKER_00 51:11

But Dolly had never heard of janky. They'll say something like, explain to me right now. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:15

So I was like, I didn't know. So I think Dolly just heard a new word and she wanted to use it. And she, but the funny thing is, she right prior to that, there was another person. It was like a cousin's girlfriend, not an actual family member, but a Jason. But she's like, I'm so glad I didn't say that. I'm not gonna say your name, but I was like, why would you have said that? She goes, I don't know. I thought it was the cool word everybody said, and I was like, Oh, I'm so glad you didn't say that. No, but it's definitely a word that we're gonna do. Janky is like not, it's not a compliment. I'm like, it's not a compliment. And I was like, well, Dolly, like, what sort of like what do you use for that? And she was like, Well, I have a word, it's not a nice word, but it's just kind of a word that I've been saying, and I don't really know how to stop it. I don't really know why. I don't I don't use it at work. Please, please, what does she say? And I was just I was like, she's what you need to know about my aunt, okay? She is all of five feet tall. Okay. Okay. Her name is Dolly, and she is as sweet as Dolly Parton. You know what I mean? Okay. Like I she has been like the aunt. I I mean, like just so like I've been close to her my whole my whole life. Nothing, n I tell you, nothing could have prepared me for what came out of her mouth. So, so instead of janky, I want to tell you like she uses this word as just kind of like an adjective to describe like many things. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_00 52:35

What what would you think?

SPEAKER_01 52:36

Janky would have been like, she was like, I don't even know. I'm so embarrassed. I'm I'm so embarrassed. Okay. She goes, I say, bitch. Bitch. I was like, this we start dying, dying, because this is so not what it first of all, I'm like, we we know you know what that means. We know you know what that means.

SPEAKER_00 53:00

It doesn't even go, that doesn't make sense.

SPEAKER_01 53:01

No, no, it doesn't go, it doesn't make sense. She's like, I just like I just say it a lot and I don't know why. And I'm like, we okay, first of all, we are roaring with life. I can barely breathe. I'm near wetting my pants, which that's standard for me. But when I tell you this sweet, sweet woman who serves in her uh church and loves the Lord. And it's like she's using this word and not in the manner of which it is supposed to be used. It's just one of those things. And I said, Well, you know, I gotta be honest with you. My daughter called me out on my use of the word shit recently. Oh. And I said, I I you know what? I understand you because I have taken that out of like my realm of swear words. It has become so part of my regular vocabulary. Like it's even like she's like, Well, you use it on the podcast. And I was like, Yeah, you're right. We do. We use these a lot. I I said it at work, not like to customers, but like in just general conversation. Like to me, it's like it's like not even of the level. And I was like, okay, maybe I need to check something.

SPEAKER_00 54:08

Something bad will happen in your house. You're like, oh shit. You know, you it just comes out.

SPEAKER_01 54:12

Yeah. Well, Abby was having a meltdown about friends, you know, again. But and I was like, I was like, I'm so tired of this, you know. And I said, and I think I said it like four times, and Abby's eyes are kind of getting as wide as saucer, like, man, mom, you've really used that quite a few times. And Elena's like, Do you want me to slap you on the wrist every time you say it? And I was like, No, because I don't want to stop saying it.

SPEAKER_00 54:31

Because I want to say it.

SPEAKER_01 54:32

But maybe I needed some like gentle rebuking on that. But I looked at Donna and was like, I get it, because I'm not even using it like in the context of the context it's always supposed to be used. It's kind of one of those things. She goes, That's exactly what it is. Like, I don't even view it as a bad word anymore. I just kind of say she's like, bitch. And I laugh. I'm like, but then like when I hear her say it coming out of the sweet little petite woman, like his mouth.

SPEAKER_00 54:53

I'm not gonna say her age, but I'm gonna say she's like it what a like grandma range or mom range? Yeah, she's a grandmother. Like, like for us, would she be by our grandmother range or our mom?

SPEAKER_01 55:02

She is the the youngest sister of my mom. Okay, so I don't really know what the age difference is there. But I would say I remember like I when I was kind of you know growing up, she was like anywhere between sixties to eighties. I don't know. She I don't even know if she's at her sixties. Good for her. She may be in her late 50s. I don't know. I she I always felt close to her because she was like the youngest of my aunts.

SPEAKER_00 55:25

Okay, that makes sense. She's very mad at me.

SPEAKER_01 55:28

Either way, either way. Which it makes sense if she's docile. I have never heard a swear word come out of her mouth ever. And she's dropping back. And she did this.

SPEAKER_00 55:37

And so I'm gonna see how many times I can say I laughed.

SPEAKER_01 55:41

I mean, like honestly, laughed so hard. And so then I was like, so her two sisters come over and I was like, you gotta tell them. You gotta tell them. So one of their sisters being my mom, and my mom doesn't really talk like that. I don't really hear my aunt Donna talking that. I've both I've heard both of them get heated.

SPEAKER_02 55:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 55:57

Okay. You know, as we all have. But I was like, Dolly, you have to tell her your word that you use. And she goes, for Jen. And I'm like, and then my mom is like, for janky. And I was like, Oh, and this is just her word. She uses to like fill in for all the things. All the things. And I said, just go ahead and tell her. And she's kind of laughing, and I wish I would have videoed my mom's face. I bet your mom was because it again, and I'm like, Oh my gosh. Was your mom surprised? Uh shocked, horrified, somewhat somewhat delighted. I mean, laughed. It was it was so funny. So then the other aunt comes in and she does it, and you know, she's giggling. And so anyway, the whole thing. And so I we, you know, we're all taking pictures afterwards. And I my aunt said something, I was like, you janky bitch.

SPEAKER_00 56:52

And that's how we end the episode.

SPEAKER_01 56:54

So, yes, and I was like, but we are not gonna actually say that anymore. Now we're just JBs. That will be the official, that will be will be that will be like the family thing.

SPEAKER_00 57:03

Just don't reverse those two.

SPEAKER_01 57:05

You just couldn't. You just, you just, you just couldn't. You just couldn't. I like JB. JB. Anyway, so that is our midsummer update. Hey, a lot's happened. A lot has happened, a lot is gonna keep happening. Yeah. We'll check in in a few weeks. We'll try and use correct vocabulary in the future. Probably not. I mean, well, I will. She won't.

SPEAKER_00 57:29

No, never.

SPEAKER_01 57:30

No. Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 57:31

I embrace who I am at this point in time. That's right, you JB. This is God.

SPEAKER_02 57:36

God made me this JB.

SPEAKER_01 57:37

This is who I am. I'm proud of it. Oh, goodness. Well, we are happy to catch up with each other. We're happy to catch up with you. And I can't promise we're going to be back in, you know, in the next week. We'll see. Maybe in a month. But listen, we're coming back eventually. And so whether you like it or not, you're not done with us. So, but we won't see you next week. We will see you soon. Have a good summer. Yeah. Something like that. Something like that. See you guys later.